One Hell of a Night

I am making another post today for the reason that I have to distract my mind for the things that are bothering me at the moment. It's not the best subject to talk about, but might as well write.
My last day of having chemo on my third cycle, I started getting an allergic reaction. My mom looked at me and asked if I was okay, because she started to notice blotches on my pale skin. The nurse had me lift up my shirt to show my stomach and it was blotchy. They stopped my chemo from continuing, and had the doctor tell them what they should do. They gave me the evil substance of benadryl to help. The doctor wanted to finish my chemo since it was almost gone anyhow. Benadryl is awful, you feel tired but even when you take a nap you still feel awful and even more exhausted.
After having my third chemo cycle the next day on June 29th I had to have a shot to get my blood counts up faster than last time. Now, these shots don't hurt when going into my body. I've never really had a needle phobia, but I freak out if I can't watch it go into my body, it may be because I'm not a huge fan of surprises. Whenever an adult is to get a shot or even pricked for an IV the nurse counts to three to tell them when they are going to be "stabed", but I am a visual learner so no, it's not okay with me. I have to watch what the nurses are going to do to me. Anyway, about this shot, it starts to take effect probably a couple hours later. It makes your body feel stiff and sore to the extreme. We all know what it's like to feel sore from a good work out, well this shot makes you feel like that X100 worse.
I had to get help to get out of a chair because it hurt so bad. When I walked I wasn't able to pick up my feet, instead I slid them on the floor taking small babysteps. The only time I decided to move was when I had to go to the bathroom. It made it impossible to sleep because everytime I would even turn my head, my body would ache. It would finally go away after a few days, but that on top of every other pain I had was too much to bare. I had no choice but to keep going, I was getting discouraged with all the pain and everything I was expected to do. All I thought was that all this pain better be worth it!
July fourth was the first holiday I had to miss out on, all my neighbors and friends were out celebrating Independence day with fireworks, BBQ's, and as much watermelon as you could eat. Me? I was inside watching TV with my parents listening to fireworks go off and watching my dog ashes run to my parents closet to hide. That night I was hoping to be able to at least go outside and see some fireworks, but I was feeling so sick I couldn't even handle that.
On July 5th I had an appointment with my doctor and I remember this day most vividly out of any day going through cancer. They took my blood to see my blood count and when I was talking with my doctor he wanted me to go to the hospital to get another blood transfusion, but for me to do it right away he wanted me to stay over night. I was furious, there was no way I was going to stay the night there, I wouldn't have it. In fact I told the doctor no, he tried to reason with me and I was so set on going home after this appointment. I was so sick of hospitals by now that I just couldn't handle staying there with bad service and well staying the night at the hospital. Somehow he convinced me to go, but I remember how emotional my thoughts were I wanted so badly to punch this man in the face for making me go. At that moment I truly hated him for doing this to me. It was never his fault and he was only doing this to help me but at the time I wanted to believe he was just laughing in my face and tormenting me. When he left I cried for a few minutes and my mom and I walked out and went to the hospital like the doctor told us to.
When we got to the hospital I was really wanting my pain medicine the pain was tremendous! The nurse took away all my medicine I came with and asked for all my medical history just dragging on my pain. Her shift was over and we got a new nurse, this girl was young and obviously newer. She always needed some help from other trained nurses on how to give me my blood transfusion. They wouldn't even get me started till very late. It was a whole waiting game. Before they would give me my blood tranfusion they had to get a blood culture so they needed two sources of my blood. They had a hard time finding a good vein to get anything, I was pricked four times before they found one.
My left side of my face by that day was pretty swollen and I couldn't even see through my left eye. They were worried about it and wanted to get me into a CT scan to make sure everything was okay. It was getting later and later at night. At one point I went to go to the bathroom and suddenly I was hacking and wheezing and I accidently swallowed some of my saliva, which resulted in me having to puke and puke for a while. While I was in the bathroom puking people had come in with a wheelchair to get me to take me to the room to get my CT scan done at around 1:30 AM. They waited for me until I finally was able to come out. When we reached the CT room I was very nervous because if I layed back I was sure I would swallow more saliva and was going to puke all over myself in the middle of the scan. I was breathing really heavy when I got there. They were trying to get a good vein so they could give me the syrum. They couldn't do it on either of my arms. They wanted me to wait outside while they called their supervisor, who was someone they said can always get the vein on the first time. If that was true, why didn't they do that a while ago? They pricked me nine times before they found a good vein. while we waited I broke down, it was the darkest time of my life. At that moment I was in severe pain, I was very discouraged, sad, mad, and broken. I wanted everything to just be over I wanted normality! I remember talking about what Hell I was going through with my mom those few minutes. I was desperate for my medicine and wanted this moment to be over already. I finally got through my CT scan and got back to my room and eventually got my pain medicine and was able to breathe again. Around an hour later they started my blood transfusion through out the night. It was the longest night, I didn't get any sleep with them coming in to bug me almost every fifteen minutes. I was never so happy to be home when they released me. I will never forget that night.